Free Association (part 22)

I went to another walk after just publishing my last free association this night. Am still on this same night. It seems that am too much alert that I may have again my insomnia. I get really annoyed how the insomnia comes to me. It comes night after night for about 3 to 5 days. My concentration throughout the day gets more bad and bad. But what is funny about it is that I made many slips of the tongue. We attended a lecture called “tool kit”. It was the first time for me that I heard about it. When we were going out of the lecture I asked my colleague this way: please can you tell me what literally a COOL TIT means? He started answering me without noticing my Freudian slip of the tongue. While he was talking I didn’t pay attention to what he was saying. I was thinking whether I really said that or I said it right. I didn’t say what I was thinking of to my colleague. I saw another colleague and we started to talk about the lecture. And am sure I did the same slip of the tongue. And he did not notice my slip of the tongue again. I smiled to my self. Well let me have a cigarette. Can I? ok thank you. Do you that I drunk about one pint of yoghurt just before half an hour. They say it contain something that help you to sleep. Was it lactate? Tryptophan? Both? Something else? I think it just start working now. So let me tell you something about my dreams these days. It is really complicated. I cannot find an explanation for them. I tried hard to find its meaning throughout this day in vain. And it starts leaving my memory am afraid. But what I can remember is that we were in a long paved way. Surrounded by a desert. We were about 5. I forgot about the other 3. I can only remember me, and a senior psychiatrist from al Mosul. We were discussing something seriously. And then came an old fashioned airplane. It was above us. a stairs made of cords came from the airplane. We started to climb it. The senior was before me and I started to climb after her. Wind came and her long wide colored clothes started to wave very hard. I became very happy then I wake up. Well I was really happy when I wake up and I felt like I found a relief from a big problem. Like someone said to me: you don’t need to worry anymore.