Monday, April 14, 2008

Al hilla

I miss it every now and then. Especially at bad times cause my mind would say to me in such times: what if you were now in al Hilla. In al Hilla I found people that support me the most through my toughest years. They were kind to me in a very characteristic way. During my first months there, I felt sad from now and then due to some causes, personal problems, they felt that, they did not ask what my problem is, they just supported me. I will never forget those doctor colleagues who asked me to take me for a tour in al Hilla. Sometimes I refuse. But during those time when I agree, they took me to places I never knew before, and start show me and tell me stories about those places. Some of them took me sometimes to their homes, were the most delicious plates were prepared for me. Some of them, shocked by my ignorance about the history of Islam, I only knew some of the things that were written in our school book, but never knew the untold stories. They took me to some religious places and told me about history in a very open, frank, wise way. I still remember how I was ignorant. I was a spoiled child. They percept that but never let me feel it. I still remember that doctor who knew from the first time he saw me dealing with patients that I may cause some problems, due to my childish behavior. So all he did was he started to walk with me as friendly as he can and tell me some jokes and deal with people in front of me, I think to let me see how I can, or must, act. He kept handling things with me for about 3 months. My first three months. Am sure he was not forced to do that. He just felt that it is his duty to teach, in a friendly, this young doctor who seemed immature. Till he felt that am SAFE to deal with people and medical emergencies, then he left me. I kept missing him. I started to accompany him during his working hours, and he was happy about that. Yeah, he is really a man to respect. A man who help you without letting you feel what he is doing. I think that growing in Baghdad in a family that does for you whatever you like is very different than growing in al Hilla. Al Hilla had suffered from tough times during the previous regime. Her people got to suffer. So they grow older fast. You may theorize that people who grow in tough surroundings will be tougher. But those people were growing wiser and more kind. I even remember that I did mistakes. I made some disrespect. But all they did was to ignore it and concentrate on my good deeds. Well I will be a liar if I say that all people there are angels, there are some people who are bad, like in every society, but the most were the good people.


Laura said...

So wonderful, how you describe this, Sami! It took me back to when I first presented (with process notes) a psychotherapy case to a group of analysts. While I'd been doing therapy for a while, I was only beginning to do psychoanalytic treatment, and I felt, at the end of the first presentation, as though I were an adult, doing a less than adequate job. I was fascinated to realize what a unique experience that was: still to have my dignity, but also space to notice that I could do better. It was such a productive way to treat people, because there's so much room to grow up into. I realized that this was just how I wanted my patients to feel, in their work with me.

I hope your mentor sees this post--and gets to see in a new way how deeply he helped you and is appreciated by you. Such a lovely way to honor him, this is.

You have such a knack for expressing human experience. I truly enjoy the way you write.

Best to you always.

Sami said...

Dear Laura thank you for these nice words which really made me happy cause you like it. Am sorry am not always fast in responding. This will last for some time cause i have no easy access to internet. Be sure that your comments & messeges are very precious for me. Sami.

Aliya said...

without hope in tragic and harsh times, i doubt many great people would still be alive and be as great as they are, your friend seems to have hope in you. you have a sincere descriptiveness in your writings.

very nice piece.

Sami said...

Dear Aliya, what you have said is so true, & i wasn't aware of it litterally. Thank you for your important comment Aliya.